26/04/2010 OMG ROFLMAOOL -- Ya I'm so hip

Internet

www.thereifixedit.com

Is a collection of poor fixing jobs or epic kludges as they are known. This is when people get inventive in solving their problems. Now I know these are supposed to be mocking the methods used but I think some of the things here are just ingenious, So here a few examples from the site

That's the printing method for the iPad, I'm sorry but whoever came up with this deserves a bun or medal or both because its just brilliant.

That is just designed to confuse I think.

That is the budget way of adding atmosphere and ambiance to a room. But with an empty milk carton

For any teachers or Students out there in need of a ruler. I've got to admit I thought using the side of a book in tech drawing was creative. This guy has taken it to a whole other level.

That's thereifixedit.com there are so many other photos on they and you can find some real gems on that site.

www.opinience.com

This is a pretty new site which is very simple. All you do is log in using facebook twitter email openid whatever, then tell the world what you like or dislike. There is a slider on the page that you select like or dislike on write in exactly what it is. At the side then you can see what are most popular. So peoples favourite things at the moment include: Bacon, Music, Firefox and Dogs. Whilst some of the most disliked things at the moment are: Politics, Winter, Iceland and School. Its very simple yet very interesting, www.opinience.com

Any regular user of the Internet will have at some stage come across a "Downfall" parody video. This is from the German video "Downfall" where Hitler is in the Bunkers in Berlin giving out and over the years people have changed the subtitling along the bottom so as its like he's complaining about up to date events, everything from Xbox live accounts to Michael Jackson's death. These videos have had millions of views and both the Director and Writer of the film have loved all of the attention it has garnered for them. But now Celestin productions, who made the film, have added the clip to Youtube's, Content ID list, which means any video uploaded recognised with the clip will be removed.... Now there was a video about this whole debacle that had about 100 thousand views before getting removed

Facebook

There have been some changes this week, the most notable being the fact that there no longer is a "become a fan button" it now says "like" on pages. facebook says this is to keep the language of the site altogether far more cohesive. Lets face in real life you wouldn't say I am a fan of "tea" you'd say I like it. Now with all change there has been plenty of opposition but I reckon its falling on deaf ears guys we'll just all have to get used to it.

A new site that was set up in one evening called www.itstrending.com works as a trend feed, like on twitter except for facebook links. What it does is keeps together all of the popular links people are sending each other on facebook. Because this is so new it could become absolutely massive and a central part of facebook or just die personally I think it will spread like wildfire.

This is Trending

Some groups for the week that has passed:

Ash is disrupting flight plans? Surely that's more of a Team Rocket thing...

who's laughing at peter griffins volcano insurance now huh?

Luckily, my Nimbus 2000 can fly through volcanic ash.

and randomly

I stepped on a corn flake, now I'm a cereal killer

Celeb

First off today in Celeb news is somebodies birthday today and that is Jason Earles who plays Jackson the teenage brother in Hannah Montana, Why is this so interesting? because he is 33.

Jedward to unveil guitar talent

Apparently Jedward are guitarists. This has come out after they had a pair of unique guitars made for them with Irish flags on by the Scottish company "Freshman Guitars" They have made guitars for Steven Seagal and Kelly Clarkson in the past. The specially made instruments have already been used by the boys on the sell-out X Factor tour.

Sean Kelly, who made the guitars for Jedward, said he was shocked by their musical prowess. The pair played tracks by Green Day while visiting the company's base. Mr Kelly said: "They got two guitars and they both play them. Apparently John was learning by ear in the shop

Lady GaGa

is close to signing a deal to appear as a guest judge on The X Factor this summer, a report claims. She appeared on the show last year but because Dannii is away for the auditions stage due to pregnancy the creators are lining up a series of guest judges this year. It has been reported that she will receive in excess of 100 grand for doing it. But It's Lady Gaga she'll draw a massive audience

Usher's hit Omg

He's saying that he got his inspiration from crowds at football matches. He said he knew it would be a hit in Europe because everyone would relate to it like at a football match. And he credits Black Eyed Peas star will.i.am, who raps on OMG, with helping him score a hit. He says, "The chants were born in France and sampled by will.i.am but as soon as I heard them, I thought, 'This sounds like an English football game.' Working with Wil.I.Am is nearly always going to spring a hit though, everything he touches musically turns to gold.

Weird news

A survey carried out around this week by EBS has revealed that kids doing their first holy communion will be getting less cash this year due to the recession. The average amount perceived as being appropriate to give a child making their first communion has fallen in the past 12 months to 37 euros from 50 euros last year. It is estimated that a child will receive on average more than 300 euros for the occasion. Another change is that apparently two thirds plan on saving their money this year in comparison to 42 percent last year. Is it me or is the money they are getting crazy? I want to do mine again.

Girl wakes from coma, speaks German

After 24 hours in a coma, a Croatian girl woke up speaking only German, according to reports that spread across the Internet last week. The 13-year-old had been studying German in school and watching German television shows on her own, according to various versions of the story, but she was not fluent until after the incident. Meanwhile, she lost the ability to speak her native language. Experts have said the story is very probable and the girl must have bilingual aphasia. This is where different languages are stored in different parts of the brain and one centre gets damaged., (just think of Sun in Lost) Pretty crazy though all the same.

Weird headline: N. Dakota twin sisters ask twin brothers to prom

Follow me on Twitter

Now some funny pics to finish off, enjoy.

12/04/10 The weird headline finally got a mention!

For some reason we were extra chatty this week




tomscott.com/realworldracer

This is possibly the most fun thing I have found online lately. Real world racer is a site designed on google earth where you can race against a computer along the images of streets and roads. You can enter the points of any two places in the world and race between them against the computer. Now you will reach ridiculous speeds and you will beat the opposition but racing against your own best times is interesting. There are cool tracks already programmed onto the site like around the rock of gibralter or by Bondi beach in Sydney, or you could just enter two points in Ireland where the google imaging is good and race there. I found it especially fun racing around city streets recognising landmarks from above.

Makemebabies.com

makemebabies.com is next. This site won't actually make you babies but will let you see hypothetically what the child of the people whos picture you upload to the site could look like. Now future parents out there this is not genetically acurate if you upload potential father and mothers picture, you're child will probably look nothing like the image you'll get. But on the plus side you can see what reproducing with celebs could look like. For example I completely randomly picked Angelina Jolie to see what our child could look like


Now I know she has loads all ready but if your watching Angie, thats what it would look like.

it works by mixing the facial aspects of the two pictures and mashing them together cutting out the 9 months and responsibility that comes with the classic method. ANybody out there who wants an effective way of splitting up with their boyfriend this will work, "This is what our child WILL look like." Also available as an Iphone app.



thru-you.com
Is a site by a guy called Kutiman who makes videos out of mixing random youtube videos and musical tutorials together. Like this one



thru-you.com to have a look at all the other videos he has made. and you can find all of the original videos there too

talktoeu.eu/eurotrip

Two guys called Colm and Martin were on the show a while back. There travelling around europe, 16 cities 20 days. Finding out what it means to be european. Check out the site to follow their blogs and videos from their daily tasks.



Facebook, entertain me!

5. People who investigate strange noises in horror movies deserve to die

4. I didn't know Twinkle Twinkle little star has the same tune as the Alphabet.
(what came first, just got lazy and picked a tune that kids would know, or was the situation like father ted at "song for ireland" where they get in the lift and their song is already playing)

3. I hate when you're hanging out with Wally and he goes missing.
(or waldo as the americans call him)


2. For those who have felt the pain of stepping on an upside down plug!!

1. running for the laptop charger like its the end of the world.
(I always do this, it always just dies as I get it)



Celeb Link

Leona Lewis has apparently just recorded a duet for upcoming film sex and the city 2 with Jennifer Hudson. This song is said to be the main theme song to the feature. This is so as to appeal to both the Us and UK audiences. It looks like she's the new girl to call on if you've got a movie that needs a sound track after James Cameron used her "I see you" song for Avatar and "Happy" is used in "Precious" Surprisingly though neither of them got Oscar shortlisted. But its good to see someone from a reality talent show after getting somewhere 4 years on.




Amanda Holden, The Britains got Talent Judge has revealed that she is considering releasing a country music album. She's after filming a special about 'country music on her show and has fallen in love with it. She's sang in Nashville, the home of country music. And she's now in talks to release an Lp. But I think there will be loads of stories this week about people associated with BGT because its back next week and they seem to be craving attention.



Donald Trump has confessed that he is a fan of Lady GaGa. The multi multi multi loaded business man has said he'd love Lady G to appear on celebrity Apprentice, his show. He went to see her live and now reckons that if he managed to get her on the show, she would win hands down because she is so driven


Weird News

www.suchtweetsorrow.com
RSC are reinacting Romeo and Juliet in the modern age over the next 5 weeks via twitter. They are limited to 140characters so end up having quotes like “jules is over an out xxx.” At the moment Tybalt is at risk of expulsion from school.


Two Chinese singers have become the first people in the country to fall foul of new rules banning lip-synching nearly two years after widespread criticism of miming at the Beijing Olympics' opening ceremony. Both of them have been fined around €7000 each. Its a bit weird though that the first convictions were brought against small singers instead someone global like Brintney Spears.


Chocolate is made literally in any flavour you want and thats not just in Charlie and chocolate factory or my dreams. Some of the wide variety can be a bit strange though. An Edinburgh based chocolatier has released Haggis flavoured chocolate. The dish which is made from Sheeps heart Liver and lungs, can now be enjoyed in a handy bite size bar. Apparently its quite popular, I don't know if I'll be digging into a bar anytime soon though.
Weird Headline: Ferocious Feline: Posties Scared Off By Cat
As always a few funnies, follow me on twitter.

05/04/10 Viral vids, facts and quotes

Muzu.tv
Is a site that deals with all things music related. Its a great way to watch music videos and discover new music while supporting your favourite bands, because all artists featured on the site get a share of the revenue generated from advertising.
They have some really cool features like the Jukebox where you can search an artist create and save a playlist and then send it over facebook to friends, or some people use it for parties and the like. Best of all this is an Irish website which is hoping to take on all those big video sites out there like youtube.


5secondfilms.com
5 second films was a concept back in 2005 by Brian Firenzi. What they do is make 5 seond films with 2 seconds for titles and 1 second for credits. They have hundreds of videos online and these are some of my favourites. Now remember its only 5 seconds so you have to pay attention and almost create a scenario around the story in your head.

First up is "Remote"




This ones called "remember the day before yesterday"





They're really funny. Theres an new one out every week day and at 5 seconds they don't waste much of your time.


mysteryguitarman

Ok so this is from a youtuber called mysteryguitarman, who can make music out of anything or look like he is anyway, Still very cool. This is the start of one of his latest videos.




Thats suspiciously like the opening to Mgmt's time to pretend. That video has 1 million views. Infact his channel youtube.com/mysteryguitarman has over 600 thousand subscribers and 53 million views. He's one of the top consistant youtubers out there so check him out.




http://notalwaysright.com/

Everyone has heard th line "the customer is always right" well over at the site "notalwaysright.com they contradict this notion very convincingly. Its a website for anybody who has ever had the pleasure of working in retail, service or other public-facing jobs. To vent their rage by publicicing the stupidity from the public. Anybody can log on and post up there experiences here. Theres 1000's of entried there already and like any good site you can follow them on facebook and twitter.
Examples of some of the posts online include.

Customer: “Yeah, can I get extra butter?”

Coworker:: “Actually the butter is self-serve on the sides of concession. You can help yourself, ma’am.”

Customer: *suddenly angry* “WELL IF YOU’RE NOT GOING TO HELP ME I WON’T COME BACK NEXT TIME!”

Coworker:: “Please don’t hurt me!”

Some of the examples on here are so ridiculous, if I was working in the store I'd swear I was on hidden camera



(A man walks into our crowded coffee shop and yells at the top of his lungs.)

Man: “EVERYBODY GET DOWN!”

Supervisor: “Oh no, it’s a robbery!” *begins to call security*

Man: “…on the DANCE FLOOR!”

(The man then “dances” up to the front, past shocked customers, grabs a bottle of water, and “dances” out of the store. Security nabs him outside the door.)

Its an addictive and neccessary website for anyone dealing with the public, plus it lets me put on voices.


www.omg-facts.com

If like me you pride yourself on knowing the randomess pieces
of cool, but useless information then you have to check out omg-facts.com. There are new interesting facts being out online constantly, you cn follow them on twitter to keep up.

So I asked Stephen did he know any of the following.

->A single human blood cell takes only 60 seconds to make a complete circuit of the body

->In many advertisements, people's clocks are set to 10:10.
so it looks like a smile

->Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

->Shakespeare wrote about one-tenth of the most quotable quotations

->24 hours of video is uploaded to YouTube every minute.

also
->The name "Stephen Byrne" is searched 4 million times an hour worldwide. Well strictly speaking thats completely made up, but the others are true so check it out. They're cool and random and make you look clever.





Facebook has 5 groups that are interesting


5. I've never actually seen someone slip on a banana peel!
(apart from in comics and cartoons)

4. greatest game ever: DON'T LET THE BALLOON TOUCH THE FLOOR
(I cannot touch a balloon without doing this, its universal)

3. that split second of fear when you lean back too far in your chair.
(luckily these chairs don't lean back)

2. "You're not invited to my birthday party" A classic childhood comeback
(well Stephen isn't anyway)

1. Naming your iPod "The Titanic" so it says "The Titanic is syncing."
(when synchronising with your computer)


Cheers for Reading as always you can follow me on twitter: _ilikeshorts

And for those of you who have read this far here are some good pics stolen from respective sites.

A Guide to Facebook Groups and stuck-in-head-songs

Guide to Facebook groups.

Ok so hey. On the show I cover my beloved facebook groups. So after a while looking at the different ones out there and with my hatred of those "join to see the picture" ones in hand I went about trying to create a succesful one of my own. Now the problem with a group is that you have to decide how much of the world you want to be able to join it. If your group has something to do with your own town or county, then you know that you are limiting yourself.

1. So first things first pick something that at least the bulk of your country could relate to.
Not eg. "don't you just love Ballybackendofnowhere"

2. Nostalgia, people are nostalgic pick something from childhood.
"remember when you were 8", "join if you were once younger than you are now"

3. People like to think they're normal (most aren't) so choose something that everybody does
eg. "using the toilet" or "I hate queues"

4. Would you go to the effort of clicking "become a fan" if you saw this group?
Seriously, is it worthy of the extra energy required to click a mouse? For "Wind is cool"

5. If you join this group; will other people think something strange about you?eg. "Toe nail clippings", "Who needs shampoo??"

6. Punctuation, its a personal decision whether you go mad or mensa.
eg. "I love pie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" or "ROFLOL giraffes xXx_!!???"

7. The randomer the better, if Seth Macfarlane has taught us anything its that people love random.
"Did you know 1+1=2" or "Birds might be able to fly but dogs can pick stuff up with their teeth"

[If you actually go to the effort of creating a group with one of my examples (why?); at least link to my blog in info.]

So I decided to use this knowledge to create some groups. I will admit though they havent been the most succesful but then again Yoda wasn't a great Jedi (dam he was). Ok so my groups haven't been that succesful heres a list of them with their creation date and current number of fans.


1. "Silencing alarms by any means possible"

This was my first group from way back in january. I will admit that I do only have 1 fan (me) But this was more of a tester group more than anything else. Although saying that, I wouldn't refuse a couple of fans at least.


2. "This is the real Barneys"

I know what your thinking (well maybe not exactly). But this group was set up with the intention of bad grammer (I swear). After coming across a million and one groups with bad grammer, that each had hundreds of thousands of fans; I thought why not have a go. At the moment I have around 300 fans so thats pretty good. Its only set up with about a month

WARNING:
If you are a grammer nazi and want to point out my own use of bad grammer in a segment about bad grammer plaease send a self addressed envelope to

William Shakespeare
Beyond-the-grave
Kenmare
Co. Kerry

So he might not be buried there, but he was rubbish at grammer too and I learned from him so.... the similarities between our writings are obviously uncanny. "To eat or not to eat?"


3. "That girl from the Barrys Tea ad is gone over a year now Search party?"

Probably my proudest moment in group creation history. You know the ad, the girls are off to Thailand and then around the world for a year and they are bringing tea with them. Now I don't know about you; but when I saw this ad I was expecting regular updates on her whereabouts so I could mark her route out on google maps and then stalk her incase our paths met. But no! Obviously the people in advertising felt that we hadn't made a connection with her, I had. After months of waiting I finally saw a Barrys ad coming on, this was going to be it, finally I'd know if she was alive, or had ended up in the back end of the outback somewhere living off of Kangaroos. To my utter dismay it was the same ad. Now I remember that first ad coming on TV somewhere around the 13th of Febuary 2009. March 2010 comes along and she's still "only going". I knew after witnessing this that a cover up must be taking place, but of what? My mind wandered what if this girl never actually existed? Could advertising just be a work of fiction? Do I NOT have wings after Red Bull? I set about contacting The agency who had displayed this documentary on our television screens. They claimed that she was just an actor and she never really went away. Thats when it finally dawned on me, all this time I had been mistaken, mislead and just misunderstood. This wasn't a cover up at all by Barrys. It was a cover up by a competing tea company! Obviously they didn't like how she was spreading the news of Barrys around the world. Were they paying her off? or had she been made dissappear? Which company could it be there is so many of them. The supermarket value brands were crossed off of my list straight away leaving but a few competitors. I had a main suspect though, it was their main competitors, a company which would be kept in the "Big Cat" enclosure at the Zoo (if spelt wrongly). I will not name them however for my investigation is still ongoing. I know one thing now though she is still alive. She is the "Wally" of the Tea industry and also their worst skeleton, when will she come out of that crypt like closet, no one knows. But she will eventually, because this group is on her tail. Thanks to some of the nearly 300 members so far, we have managed to asceratain that she is on the move, having been sighted in places from Bankok to the Bahamas, we will succeed. Even a picture of her has been discovered through our members hard work. You can help us too by joining the cause. Remember, next time the tea industry wants to document your travels for advertising purposes BE AWARE. Contact us, because we have plans to infiltrate their operation and blow this whole thing wide open.


(anything said or mentioned in the previous paragraph cannot be taken literally, especially to all of you tea execs out there)








Discover Ireland.ie

Does anyyone else think that the commercials for this crowd manage to find some of the catchiest songs ou there. I mean anyone who's seen the ads over the last few years has thouught "all these highs and lows" song was made by Satan himself. Don't get me wrong, I love the song and when I'm on a mountain or near some of the many white water river kayakers its all I can think of. But thats just the problem. I couldn't get it out of my head. Now the band may have split up and reformed with different member but all I can thin of is "is that a high or a low" then again it doesn't really matter which it is because they live for both. The song came on the radio, all of a sudden I got the urge to go to the beaches of west Kerry, or the mountains of Mourne or somewhere away from popular civilisation whilst staying near people from cities and towns. Dear god that came across wrong, but you know what I mean, I'm even from one of these places where you get more tourists than locals there during the summer season.
Which brings me on to this years ad. Back in February I was at a gig and this bamd called "The Heathers" I thought they were good but like most gigs you go to you forget most of the who played what and how everything went down. But then I got a surprise I started hearing pieces of a song over and over in my head, you could say I remembered (sorry sad pun). So on to the interweb I went and started searching, I came across the song "Remember when", listened to it then forced everyone i lived with to listen to it too. Practically a few days later on comes the ad, I was shouting I was like look I told you its ridiculously catchy. Now its stuck in the same place as "highs and lows" and the song from 'Aladin' "I can show you the world, shining shimmering fences" I know its not fences but that would be a pretty amazing disney easter egg. If shining shimmering fences existed that would also be cool, but dazzling for animals, haha. Yes so to conclude this segment the moral of the story is. If DiscoverIreland.ie uses your song then you have a pretty catchy song, Good for you!



Heathers - Remember When - Live At MUZU Studios on MUZU




April fools joke

So april fools day is gone and everyone has there different stories and rules. "ugh you can't do it after 12 in the day" well to you I say, what if your not up till afterwards, I prefer to optimise for the hours that I am awake, then bam 11.59 at night catch them. Google, this year, actualy fooled people with their "animal translator" some of the other good ones I saw involved statues of the Queen being erected in Cobh. But this year the piece de resistance, the creme of the crop or whatever you want to call it "a good one" came from the weather. Yep the weather had been planning its prank long before the rest of us. Throughout December and January it messed with our lives and broke bones (including the guy on the news) but this was all only a threat so that come April 1st it could snow. I saw it with my own eyes, snow on the mountains. To many it was like the first movements of a war as if at any moment it would run down the mountain and get us all! but it didn't. Like any good april fools prank its bite was worse than its bark. Oh I hope I'm not speaking too soon.




Follow me on twitter: _ilikeshorts

As always, if your reading this (Mom) well done heres a few funnies as a reward.